Finally the day has arrived! I am now on my journey and let me say, “Never again!” will I travel so heavy. I absolutely can’t believe it. My hands have blood blisters on them; I had to pay the taxi driver 40 SK to help carry my backpack; and now I’m trying to bribe the conductor to let me stay in the First Class train car. If only I’d known when I made the reservation! He is going to be pissed at me when he comes back. He was already yelling. I am so stressed on my heavy bags and I know there is no room for them on the second class cars. Plus how would I get there and find my seat?

Never Again

What to do when changing trains in Bratislava? I can carry my backpack, if I get it on. But this morning when I left the flat, I could not get it on. I was shocked at how absolutely heavy it had become. I had to do two trips down the lift, and then go up once more to close the door. It was a fiàsco.

Then some guy told me I was in first class, when I showed him my ticket – that’s how I got here. As I know I bought the second (class) ticket. But it is much nicer and now I want to stay. It goes to show, people don’t always know what they are telling you. Even the second guy I asked didn’t know it. I am stressed about the conductor coming back and yelling at me about trying to maneuver my stuff.

(By the way, I love first class; a large private compartment all my own, and on a crowded train.)

I Can’t Believe It

Never again will I travel with so much SHIT! I can’t believe it. What the hell is my problem? I spend money to carry shit and then yesterday I had to spend over $100 to send shit home! It’s always the same with me. I think I have a compulsion problem. I need to free myself from attachments. What a funny thing to say, as I sit here with three bags I can’t even carry; while two boxes are on the way to California; and one huge bag of shit is at Michael’s; and mom and dad are bringing another suitcase full of shit! I can’t stand it. Apparently, I am still driven by consumerism.

Then I buy shit for people -and myself – when I don’t really have any money and I can’t afford to. But I do it in return for the favors and letting me be a guest at their house. I feel it’s necessary to bring at least a small gift. This time Michael’s gift, and Luises’ kids candy, and the damn cheese are weighing me down. As Michael so eloquently put it on the way to Stockholm, “Shit presents!”

 

May 1999